Tuesday, May 12, 2009
why does medicine taste so bad???ever wondered why?
well if it tasted good, then we would all be tempted to stay sick just so we can taste the medicine.
this is so true, even in other situations...
It hurts...
I don't like the feeling of being hurt...
it sucks...
But I suppose that this hurt is suppose to help me in the long run...
its suppose to help me get over it...
to move on...
to just forget...
as much as i don't want it to hurt...
this hurt is necessary...
it makes me more determined to get out of it...
to just forget it and move on...
get on with my life...
sometimes i wonder why i do some really stupid stuff...
stuff that i know, from the start, that is just going to be painful to bear...
yet, i still do it...
i force myself to do it, all the while saying "why the hell am i even doing this???"
i keep asking myself why i bother to add to the already unbearable pain of the situation...
why i inflict additional harm to myself...
i can just leave it be... leave things the way they are...
but then i tell myself...
"pain is your friend, it lets you know you are still alive"
i tell myself that this thing hasn't killed me yet...
i am still fighting to move on...
and each addition stab to myself will make me stronger...
will help me move on faster and more completely...
as much as some part of me still wants to hold on...
to have that little glimmer of hope...
each stab gives me a new reason...
a new reason not to hold on...
not to cling desperately to the last threads of an already hopeless situation...
the hurt now is nothing compared to what i will experience if i don't let go...
that hurt might actually kill me...
Its getting easier...
with each passing day...
with each stab...
with every ounce of pain i feel...
it gets easier...
more bearable...
and one step closer to the ultimate goal of forgetting it...